This weekend is reserved to reflect on the people who have given their lives in the service of this great nation. The United States of America is defended by the most dedicated and selfless citizenry the country has to offer. In times of conflict, the lives of some of those citizens - and some who are still working to become citizens - are lost in defense of something much greater than any of us.
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There is often confusion between Memorial Day and Veterans Day. Veterans Day is a time to thank those who have served and are thankfully still among us.
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Memorial Day is when we honor those who are not still with us. When we recall and revere the men and women who have sacrificed themselves to service. It is a dedicated reminder that freedom isn't free. We owe our freedoms to the men and women who gave away - who gave us - all their tomorrows.
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We must also be thankful to another group of Americans who'd sacrificed much for this nation: the families of those who have fallen. They are referred to as Gold Star Families, and they are among our greatest treasures.
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The tradition of hanging a flag in honor of a family member serving in war began during WWI. The star on such flags are blue, and the tradition continues to this day. However, should that person lose his or her life in such service, that star becomes gold.
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This is a solemn honor that no one wants. It is a heavy burden worthy of veneration - and something all of us should help carry.
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These surviving family members are the best of us. You can see car license plates, window decals, and lapel pins that signify these great citizens. I look for them everywhere.
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I was on a business trip to the East Coast and, during a layover, needed a cup of coffee to help survive the day. I was in a pretty long line at the kiosk.
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When the lady in front of me got up at the counter, she had a difficult time finding the money to pay, she had it but was very nervous and confused as to where she put the money. I stepped around her and paid for her coffee. She offered a quiet thank you to which I responded that it’s what we all should do for one another when possible.
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She then looked up at me with tears in her eyes and told me she was there to meet the remains of her husband who had been killed in Afghanistan. She was devastated, I saw it in her eyes. At a loss for words, all I could do was hug her and tell her in her ear that she would be in our prayers and that she is the best of us, a great national treasure. I held onto her for as long as I could and told her that our nation loves her; we all did.
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That shook me. I hope that she felt a small bit of comfort from a stranger. That encounter made a giant impression on me. I carry a bit of that loss seen in her eyes with me to this day.
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Many have said that we shouldn’t have picnics, enjoy the kickoff of the summer season, or take advantage of cheaper mattress prices this weekend. They are certain that the fallen would not approve.
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My take on this is completely different.
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Rejoice in the memory of the fallen. Celebrate that such Americans existed to lay down their lives. Know that when we are having these great times with our family and friends that they would want that, they would want to be here with us, and they are if we remember them and speak their names and of their deeds.
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Whenever you recognize a Gold Star family member. Honor them. Just say thank you. Maybe give them a firm salute if you are authorized. Not only will that make them feel better it will put the sacrifice that so many have endured in your mind.
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That is how we continue to honor those heroes.
GW Ayers
US Army, Retired
CEO, Resilient Warrior
VP, Rainier Arms
